Brady Rules of the Game

The New England Patriots passing game is lethal. Everybody knows it, and everybody tries to do something about it, most ending in futility. I’ve spent a week watching tape on the Patriots

The rules of the game, so to speak, of beating Tom Brady include;

1. Possess the football, keep Brady on the bench. (Score a TD, recover an onside kick. Wash, rinse and repeat)

2. Pressure the middle, force him to move off his spot and preferably to his left where he is “less effective.”(While watching tape of Brady, at least a half-dozen times i saw him flush to his left and complete a pass).

3. Play man coverage behind the blitzes because in zone coverages he’ll dink and dunk you like a kid taking apart an Oreo cookie and eating the middle before the cookie part.

4. Change up the coverages because a steady diet of man coverage will get you killed, as will a steady diet of zone coverage. (Like my doctor once said to me, “Craig, you can’t eat bacon everyday.”)

5. Don’t get impatient or frustrated while Brady is taking you apart with 5-10 yard routes because the moment you do, you’ll be chasing Wes Welker on a 90-something yard TD catch and run and be unemployed by Monday like Dolphins CB Benny Sapp.

6. Disrupt the timing of the routes by trying to jam the receivers. (Good luck trying to jam Wes Welker. He’s slicker than snot on a doorknob).

7. Oh yeah, don’t forget to answer a Patriots touchdown with a touchdown of your own. (In the event that you’re not following rule #1).

8. Don’t be an “Aww shucks” finger snapper. In other words if you get the opportunity to get a pick on Brady, don’t miss it. Brady has an uncanny ability to make you pay if you give him another chance.

9. The only option left is for somebody to sneak in his room and cut his hair while he’s asleep. (He does seem to have something going on with the hair)

OK, everybody got it?